W.T.F.

So according to the Washington Post, "New federal guidelines ask all females capable of conceiving a baby to treat themselves—and to be treated by the health care system—as pre-pregnant, regardless of whether they plan to get pregnant anytime soon. Among other things, this means all women between first menstrual period and menopause should take folic acid supplements, refrain from smoking, maintain a healthy weight and keep chronic conditions such as asthma and diabetes under control." (full article here)

Wow, thank you, CDC, for reminding me that my entire purpose in life is to breed babies. Despite relentless attempts to limit the women's right to choose, I'd almost forgotten. Good thing the federal government is here to help me be the best incubator I can be. Well, aside from doing anything as ridiculous as providing affordable pre-natal care to everyone who needs it.

Perhaps the high infant mortality rate in this country (second-highest in the world, is it? Or perhaps just among industrialized countries? Whatever, it's embarrassingly bad), cited as a possible motivation for this new "guideline," has to do with the flagrant lack of health coverage. I doubt that French women are any more likely to abstain from alcohol and cigarrettes than American women just because they're pre-menopausal. But French women are much more likely to be getting all the health care they need throughout their lives, and especially throughout their pregnancies, simply because they all have access to it.

And what's this assumption that every woman might get pregnant at any moment? Obviously, if the neocons get their way and outlaw all contraception, a lot of us will be a hell of a lot more likely to. But excluding rape, I doubt many lesbian women will have any unexpected pregnancies any time soon, not to mention those who are not at all sexually active.

I'm all for promoting good health. But couching it in this "your body is a baby-machine" mentality is beyond fucked up. It is not my sole purpose in life to create more life, any more than it's every living thing's life goal to perpetuate the species. The government isn't telling men to stay away from tighty-whiteys in order to maximize their sperm count, or to shy away from alcohol themselves because it can reduce performance.

This kind of thing doesn't just piss me off. It fucking terrifies me. As Dan Savage says, it's a small step between "should" and "must," and this is a damn slippery slope.

25 is a lot of times

I voted for the MLB All-Star game today! They let you vote 25 times, and usually I don't, but today I did. I thought surely it had screwed up and I'd voted way more than 25 times already, but then I got the "no you already voted enough" message, so it must have worked.

Fleet week has been a big bust. There were supposed to be many many sailors, roaming around and hitting on me and Liza. But no... Y'know, I thought the Navy wasn't involved in any desert operations, but have their numbers been depleted too? Or were they too "oh, I'm in Midtown, lalala"? The latter, probably.

Anyhoo, it's now too hot to retrieve and set up the AC. Oh irony of ironies.

Cosmo Confessions

Why Cosmopolitan Magazine rules, in an awesomely trashy way:

• The invention of the word "frienvy" (being envious of a friend... I thought this was just called "envy," but I guess I thought wrong.
  
• The obligatory celebrity-gossip-couched-in-expose-on-paparazzi story, about how now such details as cold sores and "more than a few inches of space between a 'happy' couple walking together" are scrutinized endlessly. This, only a couple months after the "sure signs these celeb couples were headed for disaster" article, in which those same few inches of space were scrutinized endlessly.
  
• Cosmo Kama Sutra, aka, how many ways can we make the same 5 sex positions look new and exciting? This month's installment: just add water.
  
• The untold (except for every other issue ever published) secret to great sex.
  
• The following example of decoding bad-guy language (as in, guys to actually avoid, like stalkers):
  
  He says: "I'm gonna hit the men's room again. Three times in an hour might be a record for me."
  Distilled Version: "I'm going to the men's room for the third time."
  True meaning: "I use cocaine."
  
  Ok, maybe I have a freakishly small bladder, but when I drink a few beers I have to pee at least that much, for real.

In other news, I'm thinking about grad school. Poly-sci. Better actually open that GRE book one of these days...